"Life Thoughts"... or "Why I May Be A Crazy Person"

Remember how in school, if you were getting good grades, then you needed to be spending more time on extra-curricular activities? And if you were spending lots of time on extra-curricular activities, you weren't spending enough time on your grades. And if you were managing to do both, you weren't having enough fun. And if you were doing neither, you weren't going to college.

It didn't end there, did it?

In college, you needed to figure out your career and choose your major accordingly. Of course, if you did that, you weren't pursuing what you love and really embracing the liberal arts. And if you were spending too much time on school, you weren't having enough fun. And if you weren't spending enough time on school, you weren't graduating.

Then there was work. Ah, work. The bane of everyone's existence. Except for those three people on Facebook who "love what they do" and want to share it with the world. You know them. You might even be pretending to be one of them. But we all know the truth. (I have been known to love my job and be very passionate about it, but I will ALWAYS pick hanging out on a beach with a margarita in my hand over it.)

And no matter what you do, your life decisions are never quite right. It was either: "You're too young to get married!" or it was: "You're too old to still be single!" You will pretty much hear some variant of this until you do get married.

Marriage then leads to the inevitable: the kids questions. OH DEAR GOD, the kids questions.

"Are you going to have a kid?"
"Why don't you wait a while?"
"Have one now."
"Why aren't you going to have kids???"

(Okay, that third one wasn't a question, but it had to be included.)

And if you do have a kid, it doesn't stop there. No, that's when the gloves come off.

What type of school are you going to send your kids to? Are you going to homeschool? How are you going to dress them? What type of toys are you going to buy them? Did you spend 4 hours researching that toy to make sure it's only made of pure butterflies and marshmallows? Are you going to sleep train your child? Because sleep training is evil, and highly beneficial. Do you have an organic mattress on your crib? Because that would be a waste of money. And super healthy. And please, FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THINGS, BREASTFEED YOUR CHILD. In public. Out there. For the world to see. Or you're not doing it right.

So the next time you're lying in bed, wondering if you're doing this whole life thing wrong, don't worry. You probably are.